Satire only
Valentine Day is a New Craze in My Village
(Satire on Social subjects from Garhwal, Satire on Community Topics from Kumaun, Satire on Political issues from Uttarakhand, Satire on Administration issues from Himalayas)
Bhishm Kukreti
Those who comment that there is no progress in rural Uttarakhand are far away from reality. There might not be progress from water availability point of view but the people of Uttarakhand are as progressive as Uttarakhandis in Canada as Parashar Gaud, Balkrishna Bhatt in Singapore , or as progressive as Geetesh Negi in Singapore or Vinod Jethuri in UAE.
Today is Valentine day, Gaud, Geetesh, Balkrishna and Jethuri did not post me any well wishes for Valentine day.
However, I have been receiving calls from Pahad from Rose day about ‘Happy Valentine Day’.
Fifteen years old Sharmila a niece in relation from my village asked me through pay call store from her school area situated in my village, “Uncle! Are you aware that last year, Bhondu, Rutadu, Hagadu, Mutadu, Simsimu, Simpdyaa from other villages residing in different cities came to our village for Nagraja Pooja celebration?”
I answered, “Yes! Beta! I am fully aware that they have relation in our village and came to our village at that auspicious occasion.”
She told,” Uncle! I want their E-Mail IDs which you noted down at that time.”
I asked her, “Sharmila! Why do you require E-Mail Ids?”
She answered,” Uncle! Every girl in my high school has been posting ‘Happy Valentine day’ compliments to their friends residing in cities. Since, foolishly I couldn’t collect their E-Mail Ids I am still to post such complements. Everybody including my headmistress Mrs. Bhibhratya Devi is teasing me for my not posting Valentine Day complements to my friends residing in cities.”
I advised her, “Beta! You can offer ‘Valentine Day’ compliments to your friends in villages itself.”
She explained,” No! No! Everybody including my vice-headmistress Mrs. Dhamdyati Devi says that greatness lays if we could post Valentine Day complements to friends residing in Indian cities or foreign countries.”
I still insisted,’ But Beta! Nothing is wrong in complementing village friends for that matter.”
She shouted,” Uncle! Everybody in my school including my class teacher Miss Chhakchhyati Chhori says that it is the lowest standard for a village girl offering VD complements to rural guys. “
Confusingly, I asked,” Beta! I am unable to understand this argument.”
She explained,” Our social behavior teacher Miss Chakchundari made us very clear that since every village girl has to marry a city boy, it is essential that a village girl learns all bad etiquettes of cities in her teen age.”
I did say,” In a way, Miss Chakchundari is absolutely right”
She ordered me,” Uncle! Please SMS the Email-Ids of all the boys.” She put off the phone.
There was another miss call from my old class mate Acharya Prasad. Since, since his childhood, his inclination was towards plucking Hisra , Kingoda etc, he could not study beyond fifth standard. Very extrovert Acharya Prasad is now famous social worker of my area.
I asked, “Tell me Acharya?”
He replied,” Bhishm! You know that these days, people including college and school principals of our area call me for delivering lecturer for every occasion.”
I complemented him, “It’s because you are better orator that Atal Bihari Vajpai and late Prakash Veer Shashtri. What is so urgent from me?”
He informed,”Tomorrow I had to deliver lecture in three junior schools, one inter college and in one degree college.”
I said,” that’s great.”
He said,’ Yes! I have to deliver lecture on Valentine Day in each schools and colleges.”
I shouted,” What?”
Acharya answered,” Yes, as of now, Valentine Day has become a social craze, in our villages. You please brief me about Valentine day, the reason behind its celebration and what is the significant of Valentine day. Just brief and I shall elaborate and will make it interesting the subject by adding the stories of Krishna’s Ras leela etc.”
I explained Acharya about Valentine Day whatever I learned from the Internet Blogs as ‘Hamar Uttarakhand’ ,’Kauthig’,’Myor Uttarakhand’, We R Kukreti’,’ Kumauni-Garhwali Youth’, ‘Bedupako’ etc.
Copyright@ Bhishm Kukreti
Satire on Social subjects from Garhwal, Satire on Community Topics from Kumaun, Satire on politics from Uttarakhand, Satire on Administration issues from Himalayas to be continued …..
